The funny thing is

The funny thing is, she tells me she wants a new start with regards to some things in our relationship.

So I go ahead and do it -- whatever she wants as a fresh start in our relationship.

My woman says she wants her own space -- so I give it to her. She can't say that I am not giving that to her, because how I am now and how I was in the past are markedly different. She wants her space when she goes out to have fun, and I give that to her, simply because I would rather she go out to have fun and enjoy with her friends at times too, rather than her always just being at home. She is a homebody, I know she is. And I like that about her. But it is always good for her to get out and have some fun.

She says she doesn't want me to pressure her -- so I don't. Oh, I do, but about certain stuff that she knows is required.

She says she wants a relationship where even if we do fight, we do it in the joking way. So I try, whenever possible. The thing is -- there are good days, and then there are bad days. She can't expect me to have good days all day and everyday, am I right? I mean -- I try my best, whether in the morning, afternoon, or evening. But at times, I mean -- because she is my woman and my love, I always end up turning to her or confiding in her when I get mad or annoyed. But she takes it as I am not doing it in a joking way. Which, of course, I cannot, for that time, because I am annoyed. It does not mean that it is this way everyday. Everyone has good days, and everyone has bad days.

My woman says she wants a relationship where she tells me everything and I tell her everything. And so I am beginning to, slowly but surely. I used to keep alot of things, especially my problems that do not concern her, to myself. But slowly I am letting her know. She wants a relationship where I tell all and she tells all. So I do. I let her know when I am going out, where and all.

My woman wants a relationship where I stop bringing up the past, and I learn to begin to trust her again. I trust her in many areas, but there is this one area where I am as of now, still learning to trust her again. So I try, and I do trust her.

The funny thing is, she says she wants all of this, but when it comes down to it, she double standards me quite a few times.

The funny thing is, she wants me to tell her everything. So I do. I tell her when I am going out, where, and what time I will be back, so she won't worry. But she does not tell me any of this. I am always, somehow, the last to know. And I only know because I happen to text her and ask what time I can call her. Then she will tell me that I cannot, because she is out. Here -- she wants me to tell her everything, and I do. But she doesn't. That is the funny part.

Then we always have these situations where she is just kinda irresponsible and it pisses me off and I get annoyed with her when we talk and she knows that I am annoyed and then there, we get into a silly little fight. The thing is, being in a long distance relationship, keeping to your words and promises are important, because that is what we have to hold on to, among other things. However, it is not that way with her. She can give me a time to call, and when I text her to say I will call in 5, only then will she tell me that I can't call, because she is still out.

When you put things this way -- isn't it kinda double standard? I asked my woman last night, if she would get pissed off if I was that irresponsible. Her answer was a direct yes. Of course she would be pissed. But she does not get pissed, because I am not that irresponsible towards her. I actually do keep to my words and promises.

Then when I do not tell her stuff and only tell her like a few hours before hand, she gets mad. When I start getting annoyed that she is being kinda irresponsible and inconsiderate or a little selfish, she starts getting mad.

I am not saying that I am right in everything that I do. I am just saying that, if she were to put myself in her shoes, she would know why I get annoyed, and she would know why I call it double standards. The thing is, I do not do what she does to me -- I am not irresponsible, not inconsiderate, never selfish, when it comes to her. I keep to what I say, I think for her so much, and I give her my all, simply because it is her, and my heart says so.

So when she says she wants a new start with regards to some things in our relationship, shouldn't it apply to her as much as it applies to me? I try to give her what she wants in her new start with regards to some things, so shouldn't she perhaps give me the same? Like try not to be so irresponsible for a start? Like keeping to her words, and letting me know way before hand when she cannot? It is these simple little things.

The funny thing is -- I really love her. And no matter how mad I am at her, no matter how annoyed I am that she double standards me, no matter how annoyed or pissed I am with her when she is irresponsible, inconsiderate, or selfish towards me, I somehow just let it go after a day, because well, the funny thing is, I love her.

Because I love her, I am always on her side, no matter what. So I take all that she gives, even if some parts of it aren't really good, even if some parts piss me off. I take all of it in.

Like I said, she is my dream come true. The funny thing is -- I wished and dreamed for the love of my life to appear, and she did.

My woman. Some times I don't know if I should laugh or cry.

One thing I do know, though, is that she makes everything alright, no matter what. She is my star. My dream come true.