fly to you

In a day's time, I will be flying over to where she is.

To look for her, to spend time with her, and most of all to have a nice long face-to-face talk and work out our problems and issues.

I don't know how it is going to be like a month from now and honestly, I am scared.

Scared because I don't know how things will change once she is done with her thesis. In a way, I am scared and worried because while I am constant, I don't know if she is.

I am afraid because I worry that she will start enjoying too much her fun and whatever else she is doing, and in the process, decide that there are other people, other things she might want and might like to do.

While my love for her is constant and never strays away, she has exhibited behaviour of liking the attention that people give her, and I am afraid that once she starts getting any attention from anyone, she will start forgetting me, forgetting who I am to her, treating me like nothing, and deciding on other decisions.

I have reason to be afraid and scared.

But the thing about her is, we could fight like crazy, argue like anything, quarrel almost everyday, and yet, she does not want to leave.

What is so cute is that despite our fights and quarrels, she still tells me at the end of each argument or in the midst of it, that all she wants is to be with me.

I remember how, not too long ago, the moment we started fighting almost everyday, she would want to leave. She would want out.

But this time, it is different. She is different. We could fight so often, but she never once wants to leave me.

In fact, no matter how bad our fights get, she stays. She stays, she apologises, and she tries to right the wrongs. Even if her righting it lasts only for a while, even if her righting it isn't that right, but she rights it, and she never exhibits any signs of wanting to leave.

Rather, each fight and quarrel we have just seems to make her realise all the more that she wants to be with me.

She is very sure in her belief that all she wants is to be with me forever and to grow old with me, marry me when the time comes.

And for that, I am grateful. I am grateful and proud of her.

That despite it all, she has changed and she knows that all she wants is me. That she doesn't leave because of all these things.

If I have failed to say it, if I have not said it in a long time, then I will say it now -- thank you.

Thank you, baby.

I will be seeing you in a day's time. For our long due loving and spending quality time and being together and laughing and loving and enjoying each other.

Not to mention, lots of absolutely fantastic marvelous loving sex. And that is why we call it making love. :)