i write the songs.

Writing. Something that people take for granted. Writing has always been cathartic for me. I love to write, for a variety of reasons. I write to let go of things. I write to destress. I write to think things through in a different perspective. I write when I want to let it all out and I feel that I don't have anyone to tell. I write to exorcise the past ghosts living in me. I write when i can't express myself audibly. Writing has, and always is, cathartic for me.

This morning I got to thinking about Literature in English, the subject that I took in Secondary and JC level. I like Lit, always have. Together with History, these two subjects are of interest to me. Then i got to thinking about my results. I didn't do very well for Lit in Sec sch, got a B3. But i aced it during the A Levels, got an A.

So it made me think a little, and I realised that my thinking, my perspective on a lot of things have changed from secondary school until now. I used to be so parochial at the age of 15 or 16. Everything was about me. if i was sad, it was only me. If i was unhappy, it was only me. I never thought about things in the general perspective of the world, i never thought of how it would be like for other people except myself and the others involved in it with me.

But somehow, when I went into JC, i guess my thinking changed. As well as my perspective. It was no longer just me alone, but the whole world as well. I stopped being so parochial. I thought about things that were of concern to me and how others would feel in that case. I thought differently. And so, it made me read and understand things differently. That includes Lit in JC level.

So thinking about it, I guess the reason why I scored an A in Lit during JC level was because of a number of factors, but the most impt one was that i read and understood things more differently, less parochial, more of a different perspective kinda thing. So when it came down to it, the Unseen Prose and Poetry given for the exams, the passages they chose out of certain books that we did, i could read it and interprete it differently from the me in secondary school. Maybe that's why i got an A. I believe so, for most part of it.

Speaking of which, we did a few books for Lit in English in JC level, mainly The Caretaker by Harold Pinter, Ariel by Sylvia Plath, and Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf by Edward Albee. And somehow, every book struck a chord with me. It was as if what the authors wrote about, I understood, and i had felt it before. They just managed to put it in context. And the novel that had the deepest impact on me was Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf. I guess because in so many ways, i could relate to it. Yep.

On another note, the girlfriend yesterday told me that she thought our relationship was stable. And i thought it was so endearing and cute that I just had to laugh. I laughed for a damn long time at that! She told me, it was because she felt the r/s was stable, so she felt she didn't need to exclaim or tell me that she looks forward to us meeting, though she still feels it. I thought it was so cute.

I know she isn't one to exclaim or express herself well in terms of words or writing, but her actions show it, esp more now. I feel the way she does, though, that it isn't necessary to express your delight or excitement at looking forward to meeting up, as long as you still feel delighted, happy, still look forward to meeting your girlfriend.But if you start to feel bored, or no particular feelings towards meeting up with the one you love, then i think the r/s is stuck in a rut. Stagnant. And that is what I never want to happen, so I always think of things to do.

I guess that's about it, i've wrote on long enough. Till then, be well.